Art (Draft)

I.
The artist could tell that
he'd worried the crowd.

II.
The elderly couple clung
to each other desperately
inside
the large, black cage,
which hung from a tree
ten feet above the ground.

III.
Why the hell are they naked?
Was the most popular question of the day.

It frustrated the artist
that people were missing the point.

"This way we know they're not carrying any weapons.
A full cavity search was performed
before the show,
so don't bother asking."

"Are they dangerous?" asked an overweight man
in a Hawaiian shirt.

"Only if you get too close," the artist chided.

"And if the cage falls?"

"Then we're in trouble.
Their bodies are withered,
but their spirits are strong.
They'd drag the cage across the ground, I bet."

The artist pointed to a four-by-four array of toilets below the cage.

"But I've attempted to mitigate this danger.
You see, none of them have been flushed in quite some time."

From the back of the crowd,
a woman cried,
"I should hope that you'll refund us
if excrement gets all over the place!"

The artist glared.
"Absolutely not.
I told you to bring your raincoats!"

IV.
The activist wanted to know
if any animals had been harmed
preparing the exhibit.

"Only one," the artist responded.

"Oh? Which kind of animal?
Oh, don't worry--
I forgive you!
Everything was..."

"A dog," the artist interrupted.

"Good heavens!"

"He was in the road,
you see...
and,
well,
when I got this idea--
the idea for this whole thing--
I lost control of my car."

The activist cleared her throat.
"Was it
an Afghan Hound?"
she asked, spilling coffee on her blouse.

"Of course not."

V.
Stagnant urine
begins to glow
in a month or so
because of all its phosphorus.

The artist discovered this after the show,
sipping tea.